Transition
Change is a constant. Just looking at the framed family photos on my desk, I see my kids and my grandkids, who are changing before my eyes. I just get the pictures in the frames and the change soon becomes obvious. From newborns, to toddlers to teens, it happens so quickly. But if it didn’t, something would be wrong. Change is necessary and normal. Still, we tend to resist many kinds of change.
In his book, Necessary Endings, Dr. Henry Cloud discusses the difficult “endings” that take place in the context of businesses and other kinds of relationships. He points out the benefit that can come when we see even unanticipated change as beneficial:
If a situation falls within the range of normal, expected, and known, the human brain automatically marshals all the available resources and moves to engage it. But if the brain interprets the situation as negative, dangerous, wrong, or unknown, a fight-or-flight response kicks in that moves us away from the issue or begins to resist it. Execution stops or automatically goes in the other direction. Put into the context of endings, if you see them as normal, expected, and even a good thing, you will embrace them and take action to execute them. You will see them as a painful gift. But if you see an ending as meaning “something is wrong if this has to happen,” you will resist them or fight them long past when they should be fought. Endings have to be perceived as a normal part of work and life.
(Cloud, Henry. Necessary Endings. HarperCollins, 2011, p. 38)
The story of God choosing a people for Himself began with a focus on Abram in Genesis 12. His was a saga of unanticipated change. He was told by God to leave his familiar home, life, religion and country to go an unknown place. Do you think he woke up that morning expecting that change? No, this was no doubt a shocker. Yet Abram, who became Abraham, obeyed God and became the epic and foundational story of faith in the Bible.
Beyond seeing endings “as a normal part of work and life,” if we look to the people highlighted in scripture as examples, we should see endings and other transitions through the lens of faith, seeking to discover God’s hand in the process. Jacob’s son, Joseph (of multicolored coat fame), is one of the quintessential examples of this.
If there is a poster child for reacting with trust to unexpected life transitions, it is Joseph. From an early age, he was literally cast into situations beyond his control through which he never lost faith in God. Instead, he saw the Lord’s good intent in those unforeseen and undeserved circumstances. It all began with the dastardly actions of his jealous brothers toward him. Yet, after decades of unanticipated changes, because of his faith perspective, he was able to give his brothers this assurance: “As for you, you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good in order to bring about this present result, to preserve many people alive” (Genesis 50:20).
How do you handle the unexpected changes in life? Think about your most recent or most memorable one. How did that go? Being on the verge of a major transition myself, one much different than what I intended, it helps to be reminded it’s the norm, not the exception, for those in scripture to be surprised by the circumstances. In fact, stories of faith seem to require that element of surprise. Jesus is about the only one who comes to mind who is not caught off guard by an unforeseen event. He is also the one not caught off guard by events in my life; they’re not unforeseen by Him.
Beyond being known by Him, I can trust Him with ultimately being in control. He knows and is sovereign over the future. I can face this necessary ending as a somewhat “painful gift.” It can be embraced with a confidence that comes from knowing it’s all safely in His hands.
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight.” —Proverbs 3:5-6