With Hope
I’m not sure how long ago the first one was, but I’ve had the privilege of officiating many memorial services in 40 years of ministry. Hundreds of times at gravesides, in chapels and churches, I’ve given a message of hope in Christ to people—family and friends—in a place where, regardless of their faith, they are paying respects to one who has completed their time here and has passed on. They celebrate the lives and grieve the loss of loved ones of all ages. It is a tender time, and hearts are uniquely open to faith-related things. At least they politely listen.
Even if their faith informs those left behind that their departed loved one is destined for heaven—as are they—there is still grief. That’s OK. At least they know their destiny, which should mitigate their grief, since they should not, “…grieve as do the rest who have no hope” (1 Thess. 4:13). Ultimately, knowing where you are going should make a difference. That’s more than many people know. In fact, it’s quite surprising today how many people don’t even think about where they are going. They’re too distracted living. That’s why at these services I like to tell the following story:
It’s about Thomas Huxley, a strong proponent of Darwinism, known as “Darwin’s Bulldog.” He was an English biologist, referred to as one of the “infidels” due to his agnosticism. Huxley was active in the late 1800s. I’ve been including the story in my funeral messages for so long, I wasn’t sure where I got it. It illustrates the importance of knowing where you are going. One source online attributes it to Chuck Swindoll. So, Pastor Chuck relates it this way:
Having finished another series of public assaults against several truths Christians held sacred, Huxley was in a hurry the following morning to catch his train to the next city. He took one of Dublin’s famous horse-drawn taxis and settled back with his eyes closed to rest himself for a few minutes. He assumed the driver had been told the destination by the hotel doorman, so all he said as he got in was, “Hurry...I’m almost late. Drive fast!” The horses lurched forward and galloped across Dublin at a vigorous pace. Before long Huxley glanced out the window and frowned as he realized they were going west, away from the sun, not toward it. Leaning forward, the scholar shouted, “Do you know where you are going?” Without looking back, the driver yelled a classic line, not meant to be humorous, “No, your honour! But I’m driving very fast!”
https://www.insightforliving.ca/read/devotional/2017-06-04
The point of using this illustration at a memorial service is to allow the attendees to consider their destiny. Where are they going? Those with faith in Christ know. But at times like the loss of a loved one, reassurance is comforting. For those without faith, or marginal belief, it’s a good time for a wake-up call. They are often busy, full calendars, lots of good stuff happening, perhaps worthy causes, kids’ activities, etc., but one day, they too will face eternity. Do they know where they’re going? That’s what Jesus asks, especially at times where they are sort of forced to sit still and listen to a guy like me, who they may never have seen before.
Another important aspect of this is, what have they done with the time in-between? What did their life communicate and what will that allow others to say about them on that day concerning what was important to them? How did they spend the “dash” between the date of birth and of passing on the grave marker? You might call this their calling. Ultimately, we all have a destination. In the meantime, what we do with the time in the middle speaks volumes about how much we value the One who paid the price for us to enter into the heavenly destiny for which we hope.
“Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who according to His great mercy has caused us to be born again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead,” ─1 Peter 1:3